Monday, September 26, 2016

On the feeling of guilt on living or not living enough

... we Live, we learn, that's what we are told as we grow up and it seems to make sense, to be true, but later, as we experience more than imagined, one does come to realize he learns to Live.

We need resources to Live and those are not only the basic ones: health through food and smartness/luck, but also to Live through the risk of believing and pursuing intimate ideas, also known as dreams.

All that happens to us, including our humiliations, our misfortunes, our deep sadness, it's energy to exist.

To exist...
To have actual being; to be real.
To have life
To continue to be; to persist...

When sadness wins you over, one can feel guilty to exist, but also guilty for not fighting for living. Choosing to accept that to feel guilty is also to appreciate Life's immense value, helps turning sadness into a platonic love for all the experiences that happen to us, good or bad.

But here's the word, the concept, the thing we need and search our entire lives to feel we exist... be it platonic, dreamt, imagined, we need to feel Loved and Love.

"The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved"
_
Victor Hugo

In modern times...




Thursday, September 22, 2016

Learning more on how to Live...

The way to live is through Love.
"If a person you love comes in the same door 5 times, jump in happiness everytime, don't hold back..."


Denali from FELT  SOUL  MEDIA on Vimeo.

Friday, September 16, 2016

We have evolved... and survived. You know why?

... the consciousness of community. The power of living in community saved us.

As we look into nowadays society's trends, it is interesting to see how much emphasis is put on the individual and his consciousness, the mind as the tool and medium, and how happiness can be achieved through some/or a lot of mind control. Disciplines like philosophy, psychology and other alternative non-laboratorial disciplines are no longer intellectual hobbies of eccentric minds, but instead have become sort of foundations to our development. With that focus on the mind and the individual, technology has evolved very rapidly through emotional seduction.

Thats is why everywhere you look, it's all about the Individual, the person alone, in itself, unique in every aspect, the concept of I-technology, of "Think different" and "Just do it", don't care what others think, be yourself.

But what do you really achieve just by yourself?
Do you really think you could survive just on your own?
No electricity, no tools, just you...

We could maybe survive for some time, but not as we have here in the world has a specie, surpassing a lot stronger enemy species like the Neanderthal man.

Some scientists have shown through evidence that we're not the strongest, but since we started cultivating, not only the land but the ties between our brothers and sisters we got more powerful. The sense of being part of a big family made us more resistant to change and more adaptable. We began to acquire social organizational skills and with that, we gained a sense of conduct, a sense of right and wrong. True that we did not care much for the good of other species besides our own, as we can actually see still happening today, but in a group, we take care of our kind.

Primeval man regarded actions as good or bad, solely as they obviously affected the welfare of the tribe, not of the species."
_
Darwin

So we're not weaker of mind for caring about our neighbour. Instead we're acting smart by thinking about the health and balance of the group.

True or not, here's a good idea: "In the Babemba tribe of South Africa, when a person acts irresponsibly or unjustly, he is placed in the centre of the village, alone and unfettered. All work ceases, and every man, woman, and child in the village gathers in a large circle around the accused individual.

Then each person in the tribe speaks to the accused, one at a time, each recalling the good things the person in the centre of the circle has done in his lifetime. Every incident, every experience that can be recalled with any detail and accuracy, is recounted. All his positive attributes, good deeds, strengths, and kindnesses are recited carefully and at length. This tribal ceremony often lasts for several days.

At the end, the tribal circle is broken, a joyous celebration takes place, and the person is symbolically and literally welcomed back into the tribe."

We change, people change and with us, the world changes.
We can only survive in community, but community means that we share the same vibe, we share common interests, we care for the well being of all. Unfortunately race, religion, politics and wealth have classified, divided and separated us, but we can see the results of that disconnection: death.

Let's get together again. Forgive others for their mistakes, and help instead of just pointing the finger.

"We are the world, we are the children, we are the ones who make a brighter day, so let's start giving. There's a choice we're making, we're saving our own lives. It's true we'll make a better day"
_
Michael Jackson


Sunday, September 4, 2016

Vulnerable? Yes... but real.

This world is an amazing beautiful place, but we are not amazing or beautiful. I'm sorry if this is too brusk and too early/late on the day to read this, but how can we ever be amazing and beautiful if even towards each other we tend to choose defensiveness over trust and openness; if we doubt humbleness to ever be a choice; if we can only see miracles and grace as a subject for saints and holy spirits?

We share this same World and it's laws, and through curious minds we've learned that everything in the universe eventually moves from order to disorder, entropy.

We are taught that we must share some sort of moral conduct (aka religion), we must respect each other and live accordingly with society's rules, but what a pity that never we are taught to live with our hearts. Our Heart is not selfish, our mind is, our mind covets. Our mind wants to control, our Hearts wants to play, dance, sing, feel freedom.

The number one cause of everything, is Love: for Life, for another, for a feeling, for a belief, a cause, a choice... and being there a cause there's an effect.

Remember being in Love? Isn't it true that one of the first things that happen when you fall in Love is to lose control of yourself? Yes, Love teaches us humbleness... we fall in Love, we let our guards down and open ourselves to another. And to be Loved is to be able to show our weaknesses without the other person using them to assert their strength. We cannot love with our minds.

... but who can really surrender to the apparent randomness of Life?
How can we reconcile passion with patience? Through Love.
Love with the light in your heart and not with the "supposed laws" of your mind.

If we really care and think a bit through on what we are doing here, alive and breathing, then we can see for ourselves how this world is amazing, how incredible it is that all that had to happen in order for us humans to be here did happen. So, respect. Respect. We know very little of what there is to know. So, be humble, be gentle, be a brother and sister to the person next to you, and OK, solve problems with your mind, but feel with your Heart.

"The only way to reduce ugliness in the World is to reduce it in yourself"... and yes, we will fail over and over again to do the right thing, to choose the right word, to make the right choice, there, accept it, we will never be right. Nevermind being right! Feel love, and care for others, no one is perfect.

"Humility is the awareness that there’s a lot you don’t know and that a lot of what you think you know is distorted or wrong. (...) We don’t become better because we acquire new information. We become better because we acquire better loves. We don’t become what we know. Education is a process of love formation. When you go to a school, it should offer you new things to love."
_
David Brooks, The Road to Character



Saturday, August 27, 2016

Open up, liberate... and start living.

"(...) Imagine you’ve got a hosepipe that’s twisted and you’re trying to water a garden. No water comes out. If you don’t untwist the hosepipe, the garden eventually wilts and dies, right? Now your secrets act like a twist in the hosepipe that allows aliveness to flow through your life. And unless we untwist the hosepipe by exposing ourselves and sharing our secrets, will always live with some form of a garden that’s wilting, some form of numbness.

(...) The dictionary defines aliveness as having life, living, not dead or lifeless. It’s that feeling you get when you go up to somebody you really really really like and you ask them on a first date. (...) we’ve become so good at looking outside of ourselves to get off fix of aliveness, that we’ve forgotten we can self-generate it in any moment.
"

Tuesday, August 23, 2016

Home

There's a place where we don't feel alone and that place is home.

Cowardness is hiding behind a fake persona all the things you believe, care, love and dream. Cowardness is watching life changing right in front of your eyes and all you do is turn your face to the other side.

I've been a coward, much through ignorance and fear. But this world does not let you pass by indifferent or untouched. Sooner or later, your fears will be speaking for you and your ignorance will become your solitude.

Don't be a coward anymore and open yourself to Life. Life is indeed full of surprises and traps. We choose rather to be honest with ourselves or not, but all the rest is beyond our comprehension. I do believe there is a reason behind all, but we inflict so much pain and anger on others and ourselves that we miss the sweet and deeper origin of everything that exists: Love, the deep appreciation for a kind smile, a kind word, a sunset, a memory.

Love is the origin of everything we know and it's impossible that there's an end to all of this, a black, empty space of non-existence. I really believe we go back to where we are from, back to our Origin, back to Love, that place "where we don't feel alone, that place is home"


... We'll "see" each other again...

Wednesday, August 10, 2016

In the Dark

... when wondering through her memories felt like walking into a pitch black room, full of sharp corners. "... You were right Selma, listen to your Heart"

Blindness is a condition of the eyes because science it's not interested in studying non-physical existences, but there's blindness in thinking too.

Listen to your heart, when your mind is seeing something else. The Heart will never be blind for it never has had eyes, so it doesn't need them. It can see far more than we imagine because it feels.

I feel, you feel, he and she feels, we feel and they feel.


Saturday, August 6, 2016

Kindfullness

Our mind says it's too hard, our heart that it's essential and our soul/spirit is begging us! please, please be "kind, gentle, true... but not in a lazy way, please, do the work, go deep, find out what you are really about."

Oh, that question... That same, very old and very not simple question: what am I doing here?

Life, this one right here & now, is about the lessons we learn, but Life as a primary school teacher, it does not make things simpler or sweeter and so we as students, after any lesson, just keep adding up more questions and making up our "own" conclusions and of course, once in awhile, we wonder what can we really rely on?

The basic generally accepted ideas about our purpose and reason behind our choices and what follows after a lesson is "taught" is that we all want recognition, respect and we all want to feel loooooved.

But then we make it complicated (or not) with too many distinctions, titles between people, half truths, half honesty, half loves. Ok, we need structure, a certain hierarchy but shouldn't it always be based on the notion that everybody is important?

Hey, let's start there. Everyone is important, so You are important (despite the mistakes and wrongdoings, don't let cynicism hold you back here). We all deserve a chance in Life to change, to be forgiven and start again, this time a little "smarter" hopefully...

We also seem to believe that who we are is who we will always be for the rest of our lives, and this happens when we’re 8, 16, in our 20s, 30s, 40s… But we change so much. Dan Gilbert, psychologist says it as it is, "we start by pursuing pleasure, than success and later in Life, we pursue honesty". Word.

When we study we read things that were written in the Past and so of course we give a lot of importance to what happened, but if we put too much attention into that Past, what real chances can our imagination have to strive and inspire our Life, as it thinks in possibilities, Future maybes and why nots?

We're all looking for inspiration, but we keep searching for it in things that happened. Inspiration comes from a different source, out of time. Knowledge yes, it comes from the Past, and yes, study, be an informed person, don't let yourself be so easily manipulated, be aware, be smart, there's so much mass manipulation in society (here's something that we don't even have the imagination to picture the means and ways that big € groups imagine to "guard" the flock).

Long time ago Plato asked, "…why should we not calmly and patiently review our own thoughts, and thoroughly examine and see what these appearances in us really are?"

... why not? Maybe because we feel a bit of fear. Fear that suddenly everything that we know will change, be unsure, not right. Well there's a name for that fear: denial.

Life is a constant change and will always, always surprise you. Nothing is sure. Our only power and self-reliable truth is who we are right now and our openness to the unexpected.

Everywhere we hear about mindfulness, to quiet our mind, questions, being mindful, but I believe we should change that concept into Kindfullness...

"I started talking because I had studied environment. I’d studied environment at this formal level, but there was this informal level. And the informal level - I learned about people, and what we do and how we are. And environment changed from just being about trees and birds and endangered species to being about how we treated each other. Because if we are the environment, then all we need to do is look around us and see how we treat ourselves and how we treat each other."
_
John Francis: Walk the earth ... my 17-year vow of silence

Let's ask questions and make an effort to answer them, but don't just stop there. Share it, exchange, connect, listen, read and learn, and expect to be wrong about some things, but not about your motivation, your source. Above all, make your actions and words always come from a place of Love a place of Kindfullness.



Friday, July 22, 2016

Our Life After

In search for a grandiose, beautiful and strong tree, where I could rest under and meditate, I've found so many infant trees, thin and small, striving to survive. All of them so full of potential to develop into what nature intended them to be and multiply.

Unfortunately I kept looking for that special tree, instead of nurturing the ones that I had found.

We go through life with the same attitude. Searching for perfection, for the best shelter but blind to see the inner beauty of everything we're so lucky to encounter.

We don't think that much about those old experiences until age or wisdom give us a broader perspective and we finally appreciate what Life is really made off, which is the path we walked, the people we encountered, the choices we made. We could have chosen to be generous or greedy; kind or bitter; open or afraid, whatever we we chose defines us.

But we have a spirit, which is free and non bodily. A spirit that has a home to come back to and where it's forgiven and embraced. So we are ultimately free from all the darkness and sadness that consumed our dreams. But we are here now. And now is when we can choose between giving Love or responding with Hate.

Over and over I wrote for us to choose Love, but seeing now from afar, I have chosen self love. Love for my actions, my words, my friends, my, my, my... so self centered, so narcissistic. Maybe that's why noone has really resisted to the ultimate selfies fashion. You see them everywhere, selfie sticks, selfie apps, self grandiosity.

This self that is undermined by an emotionally bipolar Ego. An Ego that runs from accountability and it's fast in blaming circumstances instead of itself, for the sake of an healthy self-esteem.

But man has found religion to calm down it's internal turmoil and impetuous nature, trying to address the problems of life and love, death and sorrow, the universe and our place in it, what it means to have an “I” and what the meaning of existence might be... and it all comes down to one word: GOD.

And even though we don't have the means to prove an existence of beyondness, we are also not capable of living without. We need connectedness, we need to be a part of, we need to be seen, touched, loved. No one is immune to loneliness or a warm hug. No one.

... so instead of searching for the perfect match, the perfect theory, the perfect circumstance, context, situation, let's search for the meaning in our gestures and ask for forgiveness, forgiveness for our ignorance but with the conviction that we are becoming better, and we are helping our close ones to be better. What do you really believe? And are you alone in that? If not, congratulate the ones that listen to you, care for you and in the same way that you make mistakes and learn from them, allow others to make their mistakes without abandoning them, being there to embrace them again. This is Love, this is Humbleness, this is being Wise.



(...)
"At one seminar where I was speaking on the concept of proactivity, a man came up and said, "Stephen, I like what you're saying. But every situation is so different. Look at my marriage. I'm really worried. My wife and I just don't have the same feelings for each other we used to have. I guess I just don't love her anymore and she doesn't love me. What can I do?"
"The feeling isn't there anymore?" I asked.
"That's right," he reaffirmed. "And we have three children we're really concerned about. What do you suggest?"
"Love her," I replied.

"I told you, the feeling just isn't there anymore."
"Love her."
"You don't understand. The feeling of love just isn't there."
"Then love her. If the feeling isn't there, that's a good reason to love her."
"But how do you love when you don't love?"
"My friend, love is a verb. Love -- the feeling -- is a fruit of love the verb. So love her. Sacrifice. Listen to her. Empathize. Appreciate. Affirm her. Are you willing to do that?"

In the great literature of all progressive societies, love is a verb. Reactive people make it a feeling. They're driven by feelings. Hollywood has generally scripted us to believe that we are not responsible, that we are a product of our feelings. But the Hollywood script does not describe the reality. If our feelings control our actions, it is because we have abdicated our responsibility and empowered them to do so. Proactive people make love a verb. Love is something you do: the sacrifices you make, the giving of self, like a mother bringing a newborn into the world. If you want to study love, study those who sacrifice for others, even for people who offend or do not love in return. If you are a parent, look at the love you have for the children you sacrificed for. Love is a value that is actualized through loving actions. Proactive people subordinate feelings to values. Love, the feeling, can be recaptured.
"
_
In "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

Monday, July 4, 2016

Aloneness

Only when we're alone, undressed from all the should's and must's, do we really find ourselves to be. Letting the world speak in its own voice and letting this deeper sense of yourself speak out. To lose our periphery, our ego, and let the vast untamed reality be us. To feel lost but found at the same time.

That's why we find it difficult to turn the radio off, or the television, or not look at our gadget — we're afraid to lose our sense of direction, purpose or meaning, but that's exactly when we find it.

We have so many allies in this world to bring us back the sense of real belongingness, unconditional belonging. Just today an amazing red sun, reflected in some gentle and playful clouds, no wind...

SWEET DARKNESS

When your eyes are tired
the world is tired also.
When your vision has gone
no part of the world can find you.
It’s time to go into the night
where the dark has eyes
to recognize its own.
It’s time to go into the dark
where the night has eyes
to recognize its own.
There you
can be sure
you are not beyond love.
The dark will make a home for you tonight.
The night
will give you a horizon
further than you can see.
You must learn one thing.
The world was made to be free in.
Give up all the other worlds
except the one to which you belong.
Sometimes it takes darkness and the sweet
confinement of your aloneness
to learn
anything or anyone
that does not bring you alive
is too small for you.

_
David Whyte

Can we really change? Transform?
It is said that transformational change occurs when our foundational understanding of ourselves and the world around us significantly shifts. A transformation occurs when we go beyond the bounds of our current understanding and awareness. We cannot think our way through this change; we have to experience our way into it.

When we are no longer able to change a situation,
we are challenged to change ourselves.” 
_
Viktor E. Frankl

Sunday, June 26, 2016

The purpose of our Life?

How will you serve the World? What are you good at that could serve others?

"... the effect on others is the most valuable currency there is (...) that piece we're after is beyond our persona, alter-ego... let the armour go. The need for acceptance can make you invisible in this world. Risk being seen in all of your glory! (...) Our eyes are not just viewers, they are also projectors, running a second story (...) and we have two choices, Love or Fear... choose Love. (...) all there is is now, right now."

Choose... and go for it. Focus. Believe. Trust.

Friday, June 24, 2016

Integral

In nowadays it's getting more and more often that the word Integral is out there. People are choosing to eat integral, wear, read, listen integral stuff. You'll hear/read the word Integral in this and that almost as often as we can hear the word "baby" in a song.

... ok, it can mean a bunch of things too. In a sentence, Integral shows up when we want to highlight something that is necessary to make a whole complete; essential or fundamental.

So this thought leads me into asking, how can we also become/feel Integral?

Remember when you were a little brat, with no distinction between what was inside or outside of yourself, when there was absolutely no question about being or not accepted by the world, you were, simple as that. No need to cover up feelings... wholeness, integrity.

But as adults, who really feels integral with the world? Why as we grow up do we learn that it might not be safe to express our true identity, feelings and beliefs.

Everyone has some piece of him/herself that it's hidden from the world, and we do our best to keep it that way. We try to play a role that is acceptable. But that gap, between reality and self perception, usually leads to some pain, some regret, some sadness... We want to show up in the world as our true self, and leave this world feeling successful in that.

The desire to show up, to be more in the world with our true value, our truthness, with our true gifts, a not divided Life, that is fulfillment, and we all know how much better we get to be in society, be it in your work, your family or relationship, when we are free in our mind and spirit.

Again, connection is only possible when we show up in the world as we are, and not as we think others expect us to be.

"The heart is the path to wisdom because it dares to be vulnerable in the presence of power"
― 
Terry Tempest Williams

Let's be Integral in our choices. The world is full of good intentions, but if we don't actually do them, what good are they? We're not here just to be storytellers of other's lives.

Each of us has value. I have value, you have value, the person in front of you has value.
Feel your Heart, for it's really the place to understand what's worth fighting for... We can come up with lots of theories about this or that, but our Heart knows best where we should channel our energy.

Lets be Brave and grow our own capacity to express our deepest humanity, especially in places where it seems unwelcome.

Are we fully present in the world with our Integrity? 
It's not about perfection! It's about showing up "naked", with our natural humanity. Nobody is born with an empty self, but we can end up empty...

I wish there were more safe places for people to express their true selves. There's a voice of truth inside each of us, soulfullness. But we fear. We fear we might get fired, we fear we might lose friends or partners if we show ourselves completely. But we are beings before our "doings" or "status".

We want to be seen, respected, loved. Can you truly say, I Love you?

Like a wild animal, the soul is tough, resilient, resourceful, savvy, and self-sufficient: it knows how to survive in hard places. I learned about these qualities during my bouts with depression. In that deadly darkness, the faculties I had always depended on collapsed. My intellect was useless; my emotions were dead; my will was impotent; my ego was shattered. But from time to time, deep in the thickets of my inner wilderness, I could sense the presence of something that knew how to stay alive even when the rest of me wanted to die. That something was my tough and tenacious soul.”
― 
Parker J. Palmer